On the bus yesterday...

[jedusor]

Grungy teen #1: There's this psalm or something in the Bible about God giving evergreen or something and that's where you hide the weed.
Grungy teen #2: I'm all brainfarty, what's that piece of paper called, the one that started it all?
Grungy teen #3: The Declaration of Independence.
Grungy teen #2: Yeah!
All grungy teens: *start snapping fingers repeatedly*
Grungy teen #1: My uncle worked at a Jolly Rancher factory and this cow that had been dead for a long time turned its head and talked to him and he jumped off a ten-foot, ten-story wall or something and died. (grungy teen #3 puts face in her crotch) That's where I shoot my load, hon.
Grungy teen #2: That happened to me once, a dead animal talking.
Grungy teen #1: What were you on?
Grungy teen #2: I was seven, I wasn't on anything!
Woman on cell phone: I guess I did commit fraud.
Grungy teen #3: *lies down on top of girl*
Grungy teen #4: You asleep, Andrew, or just enjoying her boobs?
Grungy teen #1, hollering at the top of her lungs: I HAVE TO PEEEEEE
Nerdy mid-twenties guy: *spots my "Look at me still talking when there's science to do" shirt* The cake is a lie!

♥ you, Seattle.