Sewing and self-efficacy

[jedusor]

Ever since Kate moved out, I've been wanting to get one of those big pillows with arms and turn the other bed into a couch. I don't have the time or money to go out and buy a pillow like that, but as fate would have it, I spotted one in the trash can by the stairwell a few days ago.



I rescued it, dug a needle and thread out of my random-crap drawer, and got to work.



We've talked about self-efficacy a lot in my social psych class. At first glance, it seems like an unnecessary synonym for self-esteem, but the more I think about it with regards to my own life, the more I see the difference. It's one thing to assure myself that I'm good enough; it's another thing entirely to do things well and feel capable because I did them well.

I think that's why abstract, pointless things like honors designations and good grades don't really make me feel good about myself. I mean, they do to some extent, but it's mostly because I know they should. Something little like this, though, finding a pillow in the trash and fixing it--not perfectly, perhaps, and I hope the textiles-inclined among my flist don't look too closely at those seams--that kind of pride feels more real, more honest.

Comments

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

So it's the difference between "I can do this" and "I have done this"?

I'm listening to an interview of Malcolm Gladwell (on the BBC, if you're interested: http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/podcasts/interview/) and thinking of you!

[jedusor.livejournal.com]

No, it's more like the difference between "I am worthy" and "I am capable." I can have high self-esteem without any evidence that it's deserved (and my teacher is of the opinion that the recent self-esteem-boosting fad in parenting is ruining kids). Self-efficacy is about how good you are at something. So you can feel good about yourself but don't think you're good at much of anything in particular (high self-esteem/low self-efficacy), and you can acknowledge that you have particular talents but still feel worthless as a person (high self-efficacy/low self-esteem). Like I said, the distinction seems silly at first, but it really makes sense when you apply it.

[phaseonehundred.livejournal.com]

Verreh nice.

Accomplishing something makes me feel a hell of a lot better than being told I did a good job. If I get an A I don't give a hoot most of the time because it was easy and I didn't learn anything. But if I learned a ton I don't care what the grade was. I learned stuff

[jedusor.livejournal.com]

Exactly! Exactly.

[phaseonehundred.livejournal.com]

I think that's why I also don't care much about reward-based accomplishments. Honors and grades don't do anything to my impress-o-meter because anyone can get honors and As if that's what they want, but being competent at life and being a good person makes you pretty cool.

p.s. this place is awesome for trash picking, isn't it?