jedusor | "Mike, tell me a story about a fairy princess."

"Okay! Once upon a time, there was a fairy princess named Roy. She had a magic wand, and whenever it touched something, it turned it into the same thing, but .01 times bigger.

This flagrant disregard for the law of conservation of matter got Roy kicked out of fairy princess school. But she went off somewhere else and became a chef. The wand landed a deal doing shows in Vegas. But more people went to see the chef. So that was all good.

Meanwhile, there was a dragon. It liked gold. Because, you know, it was a dragon, and it had needs. It needed a pile of gold to sit on, or lay in.

One day the dragon was flying around. 'Boy,' it said, 'I sure am flying around!' It liked to narrate itself. It was kind of a weird dragon. Then it landed on a rock. 'Boy,' it said, 'this sure is a rock!'

'You didn't really need to announce that,' said the rock, because this is a story about fairy princesses and dragons, and so of course rocks can talk.

'Wait,' said the sky. 'Why can't I talk? ...oh. Never mind.' And the sky was not heard from again in this story.

The dragon and the rock started walking down the path, except for the rock, which couldn't walk because it was a rock. It just sat there. Further along the path was a knight with a sword. 'I am a knight that slays dragons!' he said. 'Wooooo!'

'Wooooo!' said the sword.

'Oh no!' said the dragon, 'I am going to be slain! Wait, I'm a dragon. Why am I walking on a path?' And he flew away.

The knight looked up at the dragon flying away and said, 'Wooooo! Wooooo... woo." Then he tripped and fell over. He was okay, though, because he was wearing armor. It was padded armor, for in case of tripping.

The sword got a little bit chipped, though.

The end."